wait, so, what is orgasmic meditation?
also, how to strengthen your earlobes
Welcome to this exact moment. You’ve arrived! Touch your finger to your forehead and feel the solidity of your bones.
Speaking of fingers, I thought today we should do a quick primer on one of the major topics of my book, which is coming out in about two months (available for pre-order now!).
Empire of Orgasm tells the story of OneTaste, a company that marketed and sold a sexual wellness practice called Orgasmic Meditation (or OM, pronounced “ohm”).
👉 So what is orgasmic meditation? How does it work? 👈
The basics:
Orgasmic meditation is a mindfulness practice in which a stroker (usually a man) uses his left index finger to stroke a woman’s clitoris for exactly 15 minutes
During those 15 minutes, both people meditate on the sensations in their bodies
It’s a goalless practice, and it has no expectation of reciprocation or further contact between the pair. The only goal is for both partners to feel sensation
Serious practitioners often OMed four times a day or more — twice in the morning, twice in the evening
What are the purported benefits?
OneTaste has said that the benefits of OM — for both men and women — include confidence, self-expression, vitality, being more in touch with desire, better sex, and deeper relationships
In more recent years they’ve said it helps with depression, trauma, anxiety, chronic disease and more
How does it feel?
I’ve talked to a lot of women about their experience of OM, and the answers vary. Some, especially at first, said they felt very little. Others were quite moved and wept. Some said it felt like an energizing and uplifting drug
Men and women alike said it saved their marriages. Some women said it helped them find their sexual selves after periods of celibacy; others who had struggled to reach climax said it helped them experience arousal and pleasure in new ways
Some men compared it to running a finger along the edge of a wine glass, looking for the right speed and pressure to create resonance. They said the practice of paying attention to their bodies and their partners’ bodies during this practice opened up their ability to feel
And for some women, it was simple. It’s genital stroking, and it felt good. One woman told me that she got an erotic thrill from the exhibitionism of OMing near other practitioners. When the fifteen-minute bell rang, she didn’t want to sit up and go about her day, she said: “I just kept wanting to do it again, and again, and again.”
What were the cultural norms around OM in OneTaste?
Within OneTaste, OM was more than just a practice — it became a key part of members’ daily lives. They OMed with each other and switched partners frequently
Former employees say they were also taught they should open up their sexuality by OMing with a wide variety of people, regardless of attraction. At the OneTaste leaders’ criminal trial this summer, one witness testified that she was expected to “be open to OMing with anybody off the street”
OMing with coworkers. OMing with new customers. You can imagine how this might get messy, fast
…. but that’s something I’ll get into in another post, maybe. And I definitely go more in depth about this in the book
🟧 A quick pop-by in the New Yorker:
It’s me!!!
For the full story, from a couple weeks ago, read: “The Orgasm Expert Who Ended Up on Trial,” by Thessaly La Force. (And a hello to my friend who told me he’d added me to his list of “friends who have been mentioned in the New Yorker”)
✅ Review it with Huet: earlobe support stickers
(a recurring mini-feature in which I give unsolicited recommendations)
I like it when a small problem has a small, neat solution.
Small Problem: Sometimes I want to wear earrings that are too heavy for my ears. This hurts and makes me worried about stretching out my lobes.
Small Solution: Clear earlobe stickers that you stick on the back of your lobe and punch your earring through. Weight is now distributed across the whole lobe. Problem truly solved. It just had not occurred to me that these would exist, but they do.
A few of the reviews are surprisingly sweet. Some people who have torn lobes in accidents felt unable to wear earrings. They’re so happy now. Joy can come from unusual places, including a small piece of adhesive.
✍️✍️✍️ Get your signed copies!!
Last thing I’ll shout about today: You can now buy a SIGNED copy of Empire of Orgasm and get it shipped anywhere.
As long as you order it before Nov. 5, and you order it here from Green Apple (one of my favorite San Francisco bookstores), this can be yours. Whatever name you specify you want it written out to, I will write it out. Feel free to get silly. I will physically be going into the store and signing a bunch of these. Give me work to do!!
Until next time. 🔜 🔜 🔜 🔜